6 Dating Tips to Use in Your Job Search

By Edythe Richards

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Job searching and dating can both be uncomfortable and awkward. On the other hand, they can be exciting and rewarding…when you get the desired outcome. Let’s face it though: some dates and some job interviews just don’t have the right chemistry. To maximize your chances, here are 6 tips you can easily implement – on your dates, and in your job search.

1.) Desperation = Creepy

Desperation is a turn-off to employers, just like it is in the dating world. You may think you’re impressing employers with an “I’ll do anything” attitude, but you’d be wrong. Who would YOU prefer: Person A, who has a laundry list of impressive qualities and just wants a chance, or Person B who can clearly articulate why he’s the best choice for you?

What You Can Do: Before beginning your job search, take a look at your mental, emotional, and physical health. Do whatever it takes to get into the right frame of mind, and know that there are proven benefits to optimism. Rejection comes to us all, but those who have the internal resources to deal with it bounce back more quickly and easily.


2.) Confidence ≠ Arrogance

Though you may not realize it, your ego may be interfering. If you’re getting angry about not getting the results you want, don’t believe you need to take advice from others, or fail to adapt your approach, you’re setting yourself up for failure.

What You Can Do: Talk less and listen more. Ask a few trusted friends or colleagues for some unfiltered feedback. Take steps to boost your Emotional Intelligence (EQ).


3.) Speak Up!

Remember the mousy, shy girl in high school who nobody noticed? (yeah, that was me). You might have a great work ethic, but if people don’t know about you, the odds are against you. Extended social networks (friends of friends) work for dating, and they can work in job search too.

What You Can Do: Keep in mind that most jobs aren’t advertised. “Hidden jobs” could turn up anywhere! A conversation at a party might actually turn into a professional opportunity. Your Facebook contacts might be more useful than your LinkedIn contacts. Don’t be shy to ask people you know about potential opportunities. After all, wouldn’t you help them if they asked?


4.) Say Goodbye to Mister & Miss Wrong

Are you attracting the wrong types? If you’re getting hits from your online profile, but if they’re not the opportunities you want, you need to make some changes – fast!

What You Can Do: First, understand the realities of today’s market. Second, take an honest look at your online photos and profiles. What do they convey to prospective employers? Just like dating profiles, job search profiles need to be authentic if you want to foster a connection. Know what your potential partner(s) are looking for and be clear that those qualities are ones you possess.


5.) Don’t Judge a Book by its Cover

We’re human, so we often create fantasies of what we’re attracted to. Yet how often has judging a book by its cover gotten you into trouble? Just like that beautiful cheerleader may not have been all she’s cracked up to be, the initial impression of a job may not be either.

What You Can Do: Once you’ve made a commitment, it may be too late to realize you’d have preferred something different. Conduct your own background investigation and check your expectations. Although the surface might not be as attractive as you’d like, there could be a lot of potential underneath.


6.) Don’t Fake It

In your quest the right job (or person), are you hiding parts of yourself and only showing only what you they’re looking for? If so, then ultimately you won’t attract someone who likes you for you. Though you may know what you want, if you’re not prepared or unable to articulate your interests, background, and what you have to offer, you’ll come across as mediocre at best.

What You Can Do: Be genuine. Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not. Above all, ask for help when you need it.


About the Author: Edythe Richards is a Career Counselor, Resume Writer, and personality assessment guru. Check out her blog, A Top Career.

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